Miss Moffat’s 15 Least Favorite Characters of Literature
After a rousing discussion with Salamander yesterday, I was inspired to make a list of my least favorite characters from least offensive to the worst.
15. Jim Carter “Poldark.”
He doesn’t need to be there. He’s just useless.
14. Annabeth Chase, “Percy Jackson and the Olympians.”
She’s not that bad...but she’s not that great either.
13. Frank Churchill, “Emma.”
What a puppy!
12. Joseph, “Wuthering Heights.”
The problem here is that his dialogue is written in an unintelligible English accent. After trying to decipher it for a few pages, you finally just give up and skip his parts.
11. Mr. Rochester, “Jane Eyre.”
For the most part, he’s great, but he’s also pretty sneaky, and a huge liar.
10. Galadriel, “The Lord of the Rings.”
For some reason, I just don’t trust this one.
9. Waldo Lydecker, “Laura.”
He’s a stalker and a murderer.
8. Sgt. John Hutchinson, “On Distant Shores.”
Throughout the whole book he complains about not being an officer and about how his Pharmacy corps is mistreated and doesn’t get the credit they deserve, making himself an overall pain in the neck.
7. Annabel, “The Merchant’s Daughter.”
She just wanted to read the Bible, but “commoners weren’t allowed.” NO, IT’S BECAUSE THIS WAS BEFORE THE PRINTING PRESS AND MONKS HAD TO HAND-ILLUMINATE THEM WHICH TOOK A LOT OF WORK AND MORE TIME THAN YOU CAN IMAGINE, WHICH IN TURN MEANS THAT THE COMMON MAN WOULD NOT HAVE BEEN ABLE TO ACQUIRE ONE BECAUSE BOOKS WERE SCARCE.
6. Betsy, “The Betsy-Tacy Series.”
Betsy was really annoying in high school.
5. Christine Delaney, “Beyond the Gathering Storm,” and “When Tomorrow Comes.”
I don’t want to spoil it for you, but...she makes some really foolish decisions when it comes to her heart.
4. Bailey Flanigan, “The Bailey Flanigan Series.”
I bet this series holds the current record for the most one-star reviews on Amazon.com, and it’s all because of Bailey.*(see note below)
3. Isabella Thorpe, “Northanger Abbey.”
2. The Splendora Trio, “Weddings by Bella,” and “Weddings by Design” series.
These are three overweight women who wear sparkly clothes, beehive hairdos, and one of them drives a pink Pinto. Though they are supposed to be a “fun diversion” during the series, they will actually make you say, “shoot me now.”
1. Heathcliff, “Wuthering Heights.”
He’s horrible! He’s the worst! He’s bad news! Revenge, murder, forcing people to get married, the list goes on and on, and the prize for the worst character of literature goes to this gem.
So, there it is. Who would you add to the list?
Stay tuned tomorrow for a fun list of Miss Moffat’s favorite characters.
*(Admission: I have never read this series but have heard many, many rants about it from Salamander and I know what happens.)